The Unheeded Dangers

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By Michael W. Raley

I loved you for such a long time,

Maybe I took for granted you’d always be mine.

We had a life, we had a history;

We had love, we had an unspoken chemistry.

We have come to the end of this romantic episode,

As you are willing to leave and hit the road.

I know that in the course of relationships things change

And as situations occur, priorities get rearranged.

Unforunately, in this busyness and bustle,

Two people get lost in the shuffle

Of life, career, family, illness, money, it all piles on

And before you know it, those two youthful kids are gone.

The youthful kids are replaced by strangers

Who did not see the unheeded dangers.

Betrayal

By Michael W. Raley

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I thought I understood the depths of pain,

Until I learned of your betrayal.

Everything we worked for,

Our hopes, our dreams, our history,

Was eradicated with a handful of bad decisions.

I am far from perfect,

But I never thought this would happen.

We don’t deserve this.

I always thought we would be the couple

Who would defy the odds and always stay together,

Alas, it was not meant to be.

I gave you the best years of my life

And I stayed when things went dark

Because I believed not only in you,

But in the person I believed you could be.

Somewhere along the way,

I have failed you and I am sorry.

I worked my hardest and did my best

To build you the life you wanted.

I know there were goals we never reached,

Yet, I was willing to make the best of it with you.

Although I didn’t have the means

To give you everything you wanted,

I gave you the best of me.

I realize now after all these years it wasn’t good enough

Because you no longer want me.

A Monday Morning Reflection

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As I write this, another Monday has sneaked up on us. For many of us, Monday marks the start of a new work week or another week of school. Ugggh! Right?

I know the feeling of those “Sunday night blues,” that feeling of dread that hits you in the pit of your stomach. I can’t begin to tell you how my overall mood changes. A large clock begins to tick, counting down the hours and minutes of freedom left before the grind starts over again. Does it really have to be that way? Monday, like the other six days, are just dates on a calendar, as we are the ones who assign meanings to the days.

However, I am trying to battle the dread of the upcoming day. I am making progress, slowly, but surely. The lesson I’ve learned is that I cannot sacrifice today’s peace of mind and the joy of the present moment worrying about what might happen tomorrow. For each today we sacrifice worrying about tomorrow will turn into weeks, months, and years of lost potential moments of joy.

From the date of my birth to this post, I have lived 15,178 days. If I were to divide that number of days by 7, that’s approximately 2,168 Mondays that I have survived. More than likely I will survive this Monday. I made it to another Monday! I am learning to view each day as a gift and a chance for me to be better than I was yesterday.

As you hear the ring or buzz of the alarm, the dripping of the coffee pot, and the sounds of traffic, just remember how blessed you are to wake up to those sounds. More importantly, remember that the response to the day and its events are up to you. There are a limited number of days that we get on this planet, so let us make the best of each one of them.

 

The Distance and The Resistance

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By Michael W. Raley

Continue to go the distance

In spite of the resistance.

You will encounter your share of pain

Along with equal days of sunshine and rain.

There will be body pains and heartaches

To go along with the negativity and the fakes.

Remain the captain of your ship

And do not allow anyone to recalculate the trip.

Why voluntarily surrender your time

To that which does not rhyme

With your life goals and story,

That which will only bring regret and no glory?

Do not allow your time and power be given away

Like a neatly wrapped present on Christmas day.

This life and this time have been allotted to you,

As the Bard wrote,”To thine own self be true.”

Above all with yourself, be patient, employ perseverance and persistence;

No matter what happens, remain unbroken and resilient.

What are You going to do about it?

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I’ve spent a lot of my life being angry- at myself, the condition of the world, unanswered prayers, disappointment, poor stress management, and seemingly hopeless situations. Anger is also a by-product and symptom of such things as depression, grief, illness, trauma, and the everyday frustrations of being an adult.

Anger is viewed as a destructive force which will eat away at us and rob us of any joy, as these quotes testifty:

“You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.”-Buddha.

“For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson.

“When anger arises, think of the consequences.” -Confucius.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” -Mark Twain.

When our anger becomes apparent to those around us, the question becomes Why are you so angry?

Sometimes we’ll spout off some surface answer, such as:

“I hate my job.”

“My boss is a jerk.”

“My kids won’t act right.”

“Politician X or party Y are ruining this country.”

“I don’t know how I’m going to pay these bills.”

“I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.”

However, what if in our attempt to figure out the cause of our anger, we are asking the wrong question? What if instead of asking, “Why am I angry?” we should ask ourselves, “You’re angry, now, what are you going to do about it?

***Disclaimer- this question does not imply that you bring harm to yourself or someone else. If that’s the conclusion you come to, then please seek qualified professional help.***

If we can ask ourselves about what we are going to do about the situation, we can reason through the situation. This reasoning can take time, as it depends on how much work someone is willing to go through to resolve the issue.

After asking yourself what are you going to do, ask yourself this question:

Is any part of this situation in my control? If yes, then implent change. If not, then realize the only things you can control are your responses, thoughts, feelings, emotions, and perceptions.

Let’s use the example of the fact you dislike your job and your boss. How can we better handle the situation better and  not be so angry?

-We could be thankful to have a job because some people don’t have jobs.

-We can be emphathetic to our boss because maybe he or she is under a lot of stress.

-If the situation becomes unbearable, we can speak to our boss about the issue. If talking doesn’t resolve it, then we can go to a higher corporate authority.

-We can ask our boss or coworkers if they need help with anything to ease their stress.

-We go to work and focus on our job and not worry about the stress around us.

-We can always search for another job or try to transfer to a different department.

-We could pursue a more fulfilling career.

-We could be in a state of prayerfulness or mindfulness concerning our attitude and responses.

This is just one simplified example, but I believe that any stressful situation is not worth our peace of mind and we must step back to get back on track. If you want to pursue a lifestyle change, then you must put in the time to change. Seek wisdom and find the inspiration within yourself. God bless.